Catholic Science
 
Hello all you weary pilgrims who have nothing better to do on the weekend than wallow in misery and se what Catholic Science has to offer!  Make yourselves at home.

Several exciting things have happened here.  First of all, I was gifted copies of all the Scientology books (no, South Park fans, Dianetics is NOT the only one there is...).  Second, I got a hold of some more literature which helped me make the decision to change plans a bit...

I know, I know, I told everyone that within a week of my last announcement there would be hilarious commentary from myself and the Mad Scientist regarding Dianetics 55.  I do apologize sincerely for saying one thing and doing another.  However, things happened which made this change necessary.

First of all, I found that there are well over a DOZEN Scientology books.  This made me have to back track a little bit, since it wouldn't make much sense to write a review of PART 3 of a long "scientific" (scriptural) saga without at least providing some insight and background information on parts 1 and 2.  I assure you that the Mad Scientist and I are currently power reading through that material and taking notes on it in order to provide YOU with the best information (and enough information in order to understand and/or laugh at our lame jokes).

Second of all, I came into posession of 2 editions of Dianetics 55.  The first edition, which I own a hardback copy of, is 135 pages and was printed in 1955.  The other edition, which was published in 2007 (22 years after L. Ron Hubbard's death), is 340 pages long.  This discovery birthed one thought that has been swimming in my head nonstop: WHAT.  THE.  F**K!!!

So, in order to bridge this massive gap, I'm skimming through the phantom 210 pages to see what "L. Ron" has added since his death so that I can at least ummarize the extra content for you.

Lastly, the Mad Scientist and I have been finding contradictions in L. Ron's works and have joyously been noting them so that we may give him the posthumous Internet flaming that Tom Cruise has tried so hard to protect him from.

At this point you can probably agree with my decision to change plans and hold off.  Nonetheless, I feel guilty for going against my word.  In order to make up for this travesty, I hereby present you with some FREE DOWNLOADS!

You can read up on a book we're going to tackle soon, THE HOLY BIBLE.  We present the King James Version, published in the year 1611 in beautiful Old English.

Also, you can catch up with the Mad Scientist and I with Scientology reading!  Here you'll find DIANETICS: THE ORIGINAL THESIS and DIANETICS 55.  Unlike the main book DIANETICS that Scientologists peddle these days which is nearly 300 pages long, Dianetics: The Original Thesis is LESS THAN 50 pages and has only the important, meat-and-potatoes presentation on what Dianetics is.  This edition of Dianetics 55 is the 130 page version, NOT the 300+ page monstrosity.  Dianetics: The Original Thesis can easily be read in an hour by most, and Dianetics 55 (the first edition) can be read in 1 day.

We also have our first CATHOLIC SCIENCE desktop wallpeper!  Download it and set it up as your desktop background on your computer or phone!

IN OTHER NEWS: After several weeks of operation, we've managed to still not get sued by the Scientologists, Christian Scientists, or the Catholic Church.  We consider this a legal success, but at the same time, a failure in the exercise of intellectual obnoxiousness.

Thank you all for your patience (as if you had any choice!)  Check back soon for more updates, and GET YOUR @$$ES  TO THE Catholic Science Colosseum, our official forum.  Take part in the community!

--The Reverend

Get your free downloads here.
11/22/2010 11:27:43 pm

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